divasmusings

Alright, I’m breaking a promise to myself, but I just can’t hold it in any longer: Jon and Kate Gosselin, you make me SICK!!!

How dare you call yourselves parents! Granted, being I’m neither a parent nor in the media spotlight (or crosshairs, whichever seems fairer), I have no real right to criticize. What does bother me, however, is the fact that these two lunkheads manage to get on TV at seemingly every opportunity to bash the other and claim that they’re doing this “in the interest of the children.” You have eight young ones - why expose them even more to all this, or better yet, yourselves? They’re both self-absorbed, money-hungry idiots.

I know divorce is a tough process. Hell, any break-up is - I went through it with my boyfriends, and I saw it with my own parents. But come on - if you truly are helping the children out, don’t keep making all these appearances and stupid sound bytes. You have the paparazzi to deal with, but you can’t even be called adults at this point with your nasty behavior!

 OK, what’s the latest news? Well, let’s see: Crybaby Kate opened up to Meredith Vieira on the Today Show about Jon draining their savings account. (Why would anyone want to report that? People are finicky about their money!) before that, Jon went on “Larry King Live” to share his “epiphany” about wanting his kids off the show and needing to grow up. (Interestingly, that came after TLC stated that they were changing the name of the show to “Kate Plus Eight” since “Daddy Dearest” Jon didn’t put in enough screen time. Not surprisingly, he challenged the network by legally trying to cease production.) Nancy Grace then decided to emasculate Mr. Gosselin on “The Insider,” asking - when he mentioned his new sense of direction:

“Why is it always about you?”

Reality bites, doesn’t it?

Look, I know I’m attacking Jon a lot here, but Kate’s not out of any danger from me. Quite frankly, for a woman who goes on TV a lot more than her estranged husband to do this and that and goes to magazines (Jon’s guilty of this, too - what with his liaisons and all) to talk about their broken magazine, that’s a really wonderful way to damge your kids, don’t you think? There’s the court of public opinion and then there’s the court of law, and while they may not care about the former, I wouldn’t be surprised if both believed that neither Jon nor Kate were fit to raise any of their eight children.

Yeah, I said it.

So, recently, I’ve started to think about closing this account since I haven’t used it in such a long time, but while I was sitting at the computer, something really odd struck me. You see, I work with someone who I’ve fallen for, and it’s driving me out of my mind. I make subtle hints to him, but I know I have to be careful. The thing is, every time I have a crush on someone, it ends up blowing up in my face somehow, and that’s why I never say anything to people. I’m just sick and tired of holding back, but I don’t know what to say. Mind you, I’m not asking for advice on the matter.

Sometimes, though, I look in the mirror and I always wonder how anybody could be attracted to me. It’s not a self-esteem issue, per se; it’s more of a curiosity. The people that I’m interested in tend to not be interested in me, and the people who I’m not interested in are drawn to me somehow.

Just saying….

So, I suppose you would like to know where the hell I was for the past three months. Well, I didn’t update my place for so long for a multitude of reasons. I guess the main one would be laziness. Yes, I said it. But still, there were so many things to talk about, weren’t there? For one thing, I definitely wanted to talked about Michael Jackson, but it was kind of hard to since the whole damn world was. Yes, Ed McMahon died before he did, and so did Farrah Fawcett - on the same day, no less! But guess what? Even in death, he’s front-page news! I do have a draft that I set up in memory of all three of them, but I never got around to finishing it. That was nearly two months ago.

Life has been a little hectic lately, what with two jobs and just trying not to spread myself thin with everything. I have been making plans with my family for the summer (or at least, the end of it) and the fall. Yeah, crazy time. But I’ll try to keep up here. Not that I can actually guarantee it - you’ve seen the results lately. ;)

With all the wrestling deaths that have occurred recently - be it due to drug use or health problems - it should be interesting to note that one of the most tragic deaths was not even health-related. True, it did have to do with wrestling - however, it was a stunt gone wrong. The basic premise: a “superhero” flying from the rafters in the dark into the ring. The event: Over The Edge. The date: Sunday, May 23, 1999. The place: The Kemper Arena in Kansas City, Missouri. The performer: wrestling superstar/prodigy, Owen Hart.

Perhaps “prodigy” is a strong word, but to note, Owen was the last of twelve children born in Alberta, Canada, to legendary wrestler and coach Stu, and his wife Helen. This was in his blood, and in his thirty-four years of life, he always worked hard to perfect his craft, something which I feel is not greatly encouraged today - with wrestling or anything else. What we also often miss because of the constant focus on entertainment is that even though Owen did love his fans and did love to entertain them, he was truly a family man at heart. He wanted to retire from the business so he could spend more time with his wife Martha, and their children Oje and Athena. His son and daughter are now teenagers, and it’s a shame that he didn’t get to see them grow up.

Anybody who was there or even knows what happened that night because they watched the event on Pay-Per-View won’t need the explanation. However, I received the news while getting ready for school Monday morning. I was fifteen years old at the time. My mother, who along with my father never understood my fascination with wrestling at the time, was watching the news when she called out to me.

“Do you know of Hart?” she asked.

“Who?” I obviously had no idea what she was talking about.

“Hart. Owen Hart,” she clarified.

“Yeah, why?”

“He’s dead.”

To be cliche, the news hit me like a ton of bricks. Through her brief explanation and the news report on NBC, he was dressed up as The Blue Blazer, this sort of bizarre superhero which “flies” down from the rafters into the ring and fights his opponents. It was a stunt rehearsed only a few times, as successful as the night before. Apparently, he was being lowered into the ring and something went wrong as he was in the harness. The mechanism somehow loosened, causing him to plunge more than 70 feet and hit his chest on the top rope of the ring near the turnbuckle. Ring announcer Jim Ross tried to explain to the viewing audience that this was not a stunt and that indeed, Owen was seriously injured. Jim Ross would later announce that he had been pronounced dead. That night, the owner of the WWF (as it was known at the time), Vince McMahon, gave the other wrestlers a chance to not continue out of respect for Owen, but just about everyone decided to take part in their respective matches, and the show went on. It would turn out to be the same the following night, as the roster was polled and the choice was echoed. These were controversial decisions that would reverberate in the company for years to come.

With the whole thing weighing on my mind at school, I knew there was going to be a tribute. My mom came home from work and decided to take me and my sister out to dinner out of town. I put in a video tape and set my VCR to record it just in case I wasn’t home in time (There was no DVR in 1999.) When we did return, it was eleven minutes after nine. The recording was successful.

I finished watching the rest of the program, then rewound it to the very beginning because I missed it. I watched all the staff descend onto the ramp, the TitanTron that would later show Owen’s face looming above them. It was horrible to watch all these people grieving. There were so many wrestlers sobbing, and even with the matches that went on, there were no angles. How could there be? There was a lot of solidarity that night. His ring manager Debra McMichael’s tearful tribute really stood out for me, even today, because she said, “I still can’t believe you’re gone and you’re not with us anymore. I keep thinkin’… I keep lookin’ for you.” Jeff Jarrett, who was also his partner in the ring, made a very touching comment: “In this business, I guess you got a lot of acquaintances, but very few friends… and Owen, he was one of those friends.” At the end of the program, “Stone Cold” Steve Austin took two cans of beer as he stood in the ring and toasted Owen’s picture on the TitanTron before leaving one of the cans in the ring as a heartfelt and symbolic gesture of friendship and love.

Perhaps one of the saddest things to come out of this story - apart from the fact that someone extremely important was lost unnecessarily - was the preponderance of lawsuits, not just from Owen’s family - including wife Martha, brother Bret, and parents Stu and Helen - against the WWF, but also ones against Kansas City - specifically the arena that hosted the fatal accident - from the company. There was a lot of talk about faulty equipment, that someone had to be blamed for what happened, that wrestling had gone too far to provide entertainment and employed “shock value” gimmickry. As for the event itself, Over The Edge - a tragically ironic title - no longer exists. But in the end, nothing really matters. Ten years later (and I always remember the date because - trivial as it sounds - Susan Lucci won her very first Daytime Emmy two days before after nineteen nominations, and both stories were featured in People magazine), we still mourn the loss because it didn’t have to happen, and he was such a decent human being, a prankster…just an all-around good guy. To quote Vince McMahon, in a spoken tribute made to him on the RAW special, “If the legacy of a man’s life is measured by the lives he’s touched and how much he is loved, then a big piece of Owen Hart will live on in all of us.”

So, with fondest remembrance, Owen Hart, we still love and miss you very much. Rest in peace.

So, I’m sure anyone who reads this is wondering why I haven’t updated in about a week. Well, I’ve got a lot of things going on in my life right now. Not that it would need much explaining - the fact that I don’t post anything would be sufficient enough. But right now, I’m planning a trip to see my father, and I’m really excited to see him, because I haven’t seen him in about a year and a half (not by choice). In any case, it’s necessary. The thing is, I’ve been so occupied that somehow - strange as it is even for me - the Internet is not a priority for me right now.

Have you ever felt like that?

Yes, I know this is not entertainment. Nor should it me. Again, it’s a thought. I have my drafts saved (one won’t post until August), but they’re all unfinished. I’m still putting them together, so don’t worry- I’ll be back, even if it takes a few weeks!

I have not been here in a while, but I just want to say congratulation to Heidi Klum and Seal. Heidi is expecting the couple’s third child together, and fourth overall (I guess I should correct myself: Seal did adopt Heidi’s daughter, Leni). According to Heidi in the latest issue of OK! Magazine, Heidi says that she’s hoping for a girl, so I wish them the very best!

 ”It’s really a wonder that I haven’t dropped all my ideals, because they seem so absurd and impossible to carry out. Yet I keep them, because in spite of everything I still believe that people are really good at heart.” - Anne Frank (1929-1945)
 

I’m taking a break from entertainment news for this post (although most would probably think otherwise). Now, I wasn’t affected personally on Tuesday, April 20, 1999, when the shootings in Littleton, Colorado, occurred. By no means, however, did I not think less of the situation. At the time, there had been a string of school shootings for a year and a half, and Columbine High School was the pinnacle. There was Pearl, Mississippi; West Paducah, Kentucky; Jonesboro, Arkansas; Springfield, Oregon; and these were the ones that were well-documented in the media. I remembered how much these school shootings were all over the place. School shooting have been happening for years, and it almost seemed like a new phenomenon with the way everyone was talking about them! But perhaps, because of the spate of shootings in the country, it was so unprecedented and pronounced.

You all know the story, and even if you don’t, you’ve heard traces of it. Dylan Harris and Eric Klebold walk into their school with heavy duty firearms and shoot and kill 12 students and a teacher before killing themselves. 23 other people are seriously injured. In one memorable scene, student Patrick Ireland, who is badly injured, slides out of out of a window and is rescued by SWAT team members. He would later have intensive therapy to learn to walk, read, write and speak again due to the injuries to his head and leg.

I was fifteen years old, on Spring Break. Nothing eventful was happening - I never went anywhere on Spring Break, even in college - and was home Tuesday morning in my nightshirt watching TV. I was flipping channels when I turned to ABC, my go-to channel, and saw the news. I kept flipping channels to several news networks, knowing full well that there would be heavy coverage. I sat down on my bed and just watched like crazy. I tried watching other programs throughout the day, but I was so drawn to the massacre. I began watching a special on MSNBC later in the day and just never stopped. At one point, Katie Couric - who was still on the Today show - was interviewing Michael Shoels -the father of Isaiah Shoels, who had been killed in the shooting - and Craig Scott, whose sister Rachel was also one of the murdered. Craig saw both Isaiah and his sister get shot, and at one point, Katie rested her hand on Michael’s arm and Michael himself grabbed Craig’s hand. It was one of the saddest things I remember, because it seemed like all they had was each other - the whole town sort of gripped with that emotion and sense of great loss. Sadly, it was all I watched the whole week.

My mother kept saying by the end of the week, “Can’t they leave those people alone?” (She says that every time something is broadcast ad nauseam.) Even I knew this wouldn’t be over anytime soon. By the time we returned to school on the 26th, even our high school felt the strain. I wrote a poem about it with the title using the four words that I saw on the bulletin board when the bus entered the parking lot. I don’t recall exactly what much of the words were, but I remember one of them was “hope.” In later months and years, we would even be bombarded with Columbine-like threats. We had always had bomb threats, but since Columbine, it always seemed like someone wanted to top what had happened. maybe it’s not as dramatic as a I make it seem, but the fact is, the feeling - in many cases - was there.

I feel in the years since, we have become complacent. I know the issue of gun control was a such a hot-button topic - it has since come up again in the wake of recent various shootings around the country, and the only recent school-related one was two years ago at Virginia Tech (32 people killed before the shooter, Seung-Hui Cho, took his own life). Columbine was the deadliest shooting for a high school, but as I remarked to someone two years ago, “It seems like with this shooting at VT, Columbine is quickly being forgotten.” I don’t believe in taking away someone’s right to bear arms - hell, it’s in the Second Amendment of the Bill of Rights - but what I believe in is the use of guns correctly. I see myself as a bit of a pacifist; I don’t like using guns. To many people, though, what happened with all these shootings recently has brought up the debate. They fear the Obama administration will take away their guns. Well, tell me something: what happened with the kids?

Music was blamed for what happened at Columbine et al., but sometimes I just want to throttle people. Yes, lyrics in a song can be influential. Yes, even video games can be influential. Yes, what we see on television can be influential. That doesn’t mean people should go out and do what they see and hear! It was a choice! I don’t believe that hearing a song about hacking someone to pieces would inspire to do the same thing, but it could be about mindset. You heard stories about kids being bullied, and they suddenly had their breaking point. I may be sugarcoating all this, but I don’t think blaming an art form gets to the heart of the matter, and if no one takes any responsibility and everyone continues to shift the blame elsewhere, there will never be any understanding.

The truth is, on this day, the tenth anniversary of the shooting, there isn’t much that has been changed except people’s lives. Yes, the kids have grown up and they’ve moved on, but there will always been that sadness. And how can there not be? We, too, could be there. We probably have been there. And we probably will be there.

So, I read the latest issue of Vibe Magazine (May 2009, with Rihanna as its cover girl. You can also go to the website.), and it talked about Chris Brown growing up with an abusive stepfather. It basically quoted some parts from a 2007 interview he did with the magazine which shed light on the current crisis involved him and Rihanna. At one point during this interview, he was talking about his tattoos - many of them were described as “demons” he fought throughout his childhood, and the interviewer asked him what they were, and he stated:

“My mom had a boyfriend that was abusive domestically so watching that as a kid, it used to haunt me. Not haunt - but eat at me. I used to want to really hurt the dude.”

Asked why she stayed with him, he responded somewhat prophetically:

“Probably ’cause she loved him. I hated him. That was my demons I was fighting. That’s why in relationships I vow not to be that person because seeing that as a kid, you inherit what you see, so I promised myself, I’m not gonna be that dude. I’m never gonna be that person that takes the argument that far. I wouldn’t wanna put a female or a child in that position, being that terrified.”

Reading this, I almost feel bad for him. Almost.

Look, you don’t need another voice vilifying the young man; obviously, everyone else has done enough of it already. But the truth is, even if you do “inherit what you see” from your childhood, it’s up to you to take action to prevent that from happening. Honestly, that’s what Chris should have done. If he has seen that, it should help him go in the other direction. I think the fact that Chris grew up in that environment (which, in this current issue, his mother’s former boyfriend denies) may explain - a little - what happened that night, but by no means is it the full story. And just because of what he’s revealing, we can’t necessarily feel sympathy for him nor can we attack him. The point of all of this is to just wait and see. To invest in his drama and not pay attention to the ones in our lives is something we can barely afford to do.

Anyway, enough grandstanding.

I was looking through the magazine last night, flipping through all these pages, and there was a section in the beginning of the magazine where it showed pictures of celebrity couples like Ike and Tina Turner, Mike Tyson and Robin Givens, and The Notorious B.I.G. and Faith Evans. The editor of the magazine, Danyel Smith, footnoted the collage by stating, “Had more photos… But pulling them together is too tragic. Depressing.”

It seems, from what she is insinuating, that Chris Brown and Rihanna have joined the ranks of the famous who are in abusive relationships.

In celebrity baby news, according to a source close to them, actors Sarah Michelle Gellar and Freddie Prinze, Jr. - who have been married for more than six years - are expecting their first child together! The news was apparently featured in People Magazine, and Mrs. Prinze is due sometime in the fall. Now, they’re one of the rare Hollywood couples who have been married for a long time, and I’ve been rooting for them. So, all I’ve got to say is…. congratulations to the happy couple!

I have a category called “The Arachne Complex,” a reference to Greek mythology about a poor peasant girl who was very skilled at weaving and arrogantly challenged the goddess Athena - who ruled over weaving, among other things - to a spinning contest. Athena ended up losing the contest, but was angry at the fact that Arachne - excellent as she was - had dared to even be so presumptuous and insulting to the gods, being that she was a mortal. Arachne realizes her mistake and hangs herself, but Athena spares her suicide by turning her into a spider.

Perhaps this is what “South Park” did to Kanye West… of sorts.

Wednesday night’s episode dealt with the artist’s hyped narcissism (for what it’s worth, I had to laugh at the “Gay Fish” video), causing Mr. West on his blog to reflect upon his notoriously inflated ego and how it makes people take him less seriously when it comes to his craft. In the past, he has been known to throw tantrums for not winning awards that he feels he was supposed to win, and he’s also made comments about his self-importance, calling himself “the voice of his generation.”

Well, maybe Trey Parker and Matt Stone are trying to remind him of what humility is. According to the blog (which appears as an angry message due to the fact that everything is capitalized, even if it really isn’t):

“SOUTH PARK MURDERED ME LAST NIGHT AND IT’S PRETTY FUNNY. IT HURTS MY FEELINGS BUT WHAT CAN YOU EXPECT FROM SOUTH PARK! I ACTUALLY HAVE BEEN WORKING ON MY EGO THOUGH. HAVING THE CRAZY EGO IS PLAYED OUT IN MY LIFE AND CAREER.”

Rarely does anything such as an animated show that skewers public figures on a regular basis have such an impact as to change someone’s view of him or herself. Kanye’s needs for self-exaltation - only fueled by his popularity, which seemed at points to go to his head - might have put his career in jeopardy if all he said was taken with a grain of salt and nothing ever came of his boasting. He says that he’s been working on keeping his ego in check, and it probably wasn’t only the show that did the trick. He has dealt with the loss of his mother and the dissolution of a relationship, but “South Park” apparently affected him the most.

Let’s just see how long that lasts.